Tag Archives: empowerment

Be Active Physically and Mentally, THINK BETTER!

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Active Lifestyle Associated with Better Brain Functioning

It’s old news that you function better overall if you are not a couch potato. However, here’s a slightly new wrinkle–either mental or physical activity produce improved cognitive functioning.

No limits on activity that will work!

No limits on activity that will work!

In a study last May, first published by the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA), and reported in Science Daily, cognition improved significantly with both mental and physical activity, but neither was better than the other.

While cognitive functioning improved a good deal over the course of the study, one conclusion was that the amount of activity is more important than the type of activity. The authors demonstrated that stimulating activity, either mental activity or exercise, can improve cognition in only 12 weeks.

Set Up Your Own Experiment

To see if you, too, can change your cognitive functioning for the better, try one hour 3 days a week of home based mental activity and one hour of physical exercise 3 days a week for 12 weeks. Perhaps games, puzzles, stimulating conversation, or learning new information would be good mental activities. A physical activity in a class setting was used in the study; perhaps yoga, gym based exercise, or even walking as vigorously as possible with a friend. The point would be to not do more than you are comfortable doing, but to get moving.100_0545

Why Bother?

From the perspective of a retired person, life is no fun, if you aren’t intimately involved with your own use of time and energy. Being retired or having the kids move on in their lives often leaves a big hole, especially if you were active. If your cognitive function declines because your life has essentially become boring or never stimulating, it’s a “no brainer” to know something needs to change.

Additionally and on a broader scale, a worldwide epidemic of dementia is anticipated during the next 40 years. Longer life expectancies and changes in lifestyle contribute. Activities that you are engaged in are potential strategies to prevent or delay dementia in individuals prior to decline in cognitive functioning.

What’s in It for You?

Never too old!

Never too old!

Be the driver of your own destiny, not waiting around for age to overtake you. Chances are that more active participation in your own life will mean a truly better life!

Words of Wisdom from an Online Senior Dater!

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Online Dating Gave Me a Lesson in Personal Growth!


My name is Carol, and I have been a senior online dater for a couple of years. I have some thoughts I would like to share with you.

Life’s dream of a loving partner makes both sexes look for ways to meet a friend or find a deeper relationship. There are many online dating websites and seniors are members of many sites. There are religious sites, ones that try to match you up according to different ideas, like personality, preferences, etc., and ones that are free for all.

Online Dating Services Want You as a Customer!

When you sign up, you can set up your picture and personal profile. Go through the other members profiles and pick who you think matches you. You look for similar ideals, and things that are important to your heart. Some people do not post pictures on their profile. Those profiles that do not have pictures should bring an awareness of a person who is secretive, not good. Openness should be there, if not, I would tell you to pass.

By reading their profiles, it will help you to answer a message or for you to send a flirt, message or make them a favorite. Also, be aware they are putting in things that they think will attract you, so read the profiles carefully.

Whatever stage or life situation you are in, online dating could be a positive way to open new avenues to meet someone who could change your life. It is a great, fun way to meet, if you are young, in mid life or a senior looking for a new partner. It is a great possibility to make new friends, a casual relationship, or a the love of your life.

Pay Attention to Your Instincts

First put away fear or doubt. Go in knowing the basic rules, be positive, and follow your gut feelings. Always be careful, and going slowly is in your favor.

Here are few simple musts. Do not give your phone number or use your cell. Its possible to use *67 and it will block your number when calling someone from the site. I think it would be in your best interest not to give your address until you have met your online partner 3 or 4 times. Always meet in a public place!!!!!! It can be coffee, a drink, lunch or dinner. Know what your looking for; it will make things easier.

Most of all never be intimidated. If anything makes you the slightest bit uncomfortable, saying NO is acceptable. Men are more physical and like intimacy much faster than women. You never win someone’s heart with a quick romp in the hay, but high ideals make you thought of as more of a keeper.

Let your online dating be a part of the new you! Most of all enjoy!


Senior Online Dating Creates Hope

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Your Life Feels Empty, No Relationship?

It is no secret, you’ve felt lonely with a big hole in the heart of your life, if you are missing a relationship. The solution has been elusive to find someone to share your life, no matter how hard you and friends try? No one seems to stand out as a possibility. Or maybe you haven’t even met anyone for a long time?.

Whatever, place you are in, when you are introduced, the solution looms big, too good to be true. But, then, so do all your hesitations, fears, “no, I can’t!” Perhaps you’ve even heard friends say they are online looking for a relationship, or the websites’ advertising lures you back into thinking “Yes, this could be a solution.” I’ll try it.

The Surprising Answer for Millions
Online dating services aren’t just the solution for seniors, everybody, but “us old holdouts,” have gotten on the wagon of hope.

Life becomes fun and not lonely.

Life becomes fun and not lonely.

It is time, so you brave it, get recommendations from friends, or just sign up! The first hurdle is jumped over, you are on your way. Now what? Write your profile? Ok, here’s where the hesitations rear their heads again. “What could I say why anyone would want ME?”

So, you try to be truthful, that’s what seems logical and what the experts advise, or “I will get someone who will be so disappointed when we finally meet that he/she will run away screaming!” So you hide as best as you can what you perceive as the most obvious negatives, and start to identify the positives. Excellent beginning!

Not Bad, You Begin the Process of Putting Yourself Out There!

You have a goal: present an enticing picture, so you can share your life with someone. It may be difficult to not get stuck at this point, thinking about putting a profile of you out for all to see. But those who forge ahead and write a profile find it gets easier as you keep trying. Likely your profile will be a mixture of the real you and who you would like to be. At the very least, that is an admirable start. You know more about you now than you did when you first began. And you have some qualities to shoot for or hone to perfection.

When the profile stumbling block is conquered, the search for the perfect mate commences. Uh OHHHH…had you best take another look at yourself? Do you need to rethink what you want? This could be real, what if…..are you ready to commit yourself to this process for real?

Well, maybe, while you are thinking this through, you will have to trust that wise “ole” inner self to kick in, lead you, work through some of the fears.

Millions of Seniors are Looking for Valentine’s Mates Online Every Day

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Seniors Wanting to End Isolation and Find Relationships
Enlist Big Time Helpers in Online Dating Sites

Remember when well-meaning friends wanted to introduce you to a “really wonderful man or woman,” because they didn’t want you to be lonely? Or when you shyly ask friends if they knew anyone single they could hook you up with, maybe even develop a relationship with?

In those days, Valentine’s Day was going to be another lonely day! Self-esteem took a dive. Quality of Life dropped. Even today, a few of these connections might work; the majority don’t.

If you are still thinking those thoughts that your only way to find love is through others, you are out of touch. The entire senior social scramble has been tossed on end, and the internet is your friend! Many of your single friends have overcome fears about computers and the internet and are socializing through their tablet computers or cell phones. And they are finding happiness.

Not counting the many other dating sites, Senior Planet reports that Match.com boasts 2.5 million senior members.

If You Want to Change Your Dating Possibilities,
Get Up to Speed with Online Dating for Seniors

Navigating the world of online dating can be intimidating at first, but it’s a lot easier than you think. The Top 10 Senior Dating Sites can direct you on your way to finding your soul mate in no time.

The site says “Your profile should be a small window into your lifestyle and personality. Think of it as an advertisement that describes who you are and what you are looking for….Choose recent pictures that are flattering but accurate. The ultimate goal of online dating is meeting in person, so it’s important to make your profile as honest as possible without giving away sensitive information.”

Some of you were taught to be careful and not trust everything you hear. You should be wary online. The Internet is global and the world can be dangerous. You avoid bad neighborhoods in real life, and people who lie, so steer away from risky websites on the Internet and do not believe every claim. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Meet in a public place a distance away from home and bring a friend. Always have an exit strategy, and chuck any old-fashioned social protocols that make you think you always should be socially correct. Be polite. But, leave if you suspect things are not what they seem.

Finally, the Top Ten Dating Sites says “when building an online profile, be truthful. Do not pretend to be something false. Otherwise it brings disappointments with the type of dates the profile attracts. If one’s lifestyle is more sedentary than active, let it be known. It applies equally if one’s life is more active than sedentary. Not telling the truth becomes discouraging in that potential dates will not be what you want. If the future possibility of remarrying is on the table or out of the question, tell the truth about that too.”

I will be sharing the experiences of real life seniors who use the online dating services in future posts. They have interesting insights that will be helpful, and probably eye-opening.

Go Ahead–Trust Your Inner Wisdom

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Here’s a Coping Skill Ready for Use Now!

Amazingly, the wise inner self, with its personal growth answers, may lay dormant for long periods of time. You may need to develop confidence in your own abilities to find solutions to life problems, empowering yourself. An optimistic attitude will push you forward, and help overcome anxiety.

Building confidence means trusting yourself to come up with answers. You may even be

Whooooo but you!

Whooooo but you!

telling yourself that other, wiser people have the answers for you, without even
listening to or trusting your inner voice.

You may never have considered that you have strengths beyond the obvious. When under pressure, it is common to forget inner resources that are available and accessible with practice. Perhaps you have been so resistant to developing inner resources that the idea of turning inside for help is too foreign. Maybe you are so dependent on others that you wait for a “magic answer.”

Perhaps you have been too traumatized, and need professional therapy. There’s not just one answer; you can strengthen inner resources along with professional help. Indeed, that is the perfect solution.

Answers That Materialize, Much To Our Surprise

Have you ever tried to figure out a problem or remember a name or solution, only to draw a blank? Finally, just letting go, continuing on with the day, or sleeping, suddenly you are aware that the solution pops into your head? The mind is forever a source of wonder. Evidently, we have to be relaxed to access our strongest resources. The all-knowing inner strengths are usually there for the asking and believing. We have to cultivate our access, though, like you would plant and nurture a beautiful garden.

As you embrace building inner wisdom in your personal growth and development, the process may be hampered by periods of trauma or upheaval. Patience will be your helper. Meditating or just sitting quietly fosters self-confidence, and often turns up the level of self-knowledge.

Practice Makes Growth Solid

As with learning all new abilities, these skills and intuitive senses need practice and work before they are reliable. The added value is that as you practice, you will be learning and accomplishing relaxation. The practice will require sitting quietly, centering yourself, focusing on developing expertise for yourself, and quieting your mind.

If you find little success, take a walk in nature and focus on what your senses bring, for example, the blue of the sky, the sound of distant birds, or sit on the beach and feel sand trickle through your fingers. When you have achieved a relaxed state, put a question to your self. What are you trying to solve? Don’t throw away any answers that bubble up. End by giving thanks, and return to your day. You will be turning over your dilemma to your inner wisdom. Watch and listen carefully in the days to come for new answers.

From 50 to 600 Kids Fed!

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Community Tackles Quality of Kids’ Lives

When children of low income families face a weekend, their quality of life may suffer. Their school source of healthy food comes to a halt. No so in White Pine County, Nevada, where three concerned community members decided to make a difference in these children’s lives.

Paula Sims, Red Sims and Margaret Bath learned of programs in other towns that met such hunger needs. That was all it took, a great idea made passionate for their community. St. Bartholomew Episcopal Church where Red Sims is priest began laying the foundation for this community action.

The result is the Committee Against Child Hunger (CACH). This community group was formed to provide nutritious “back pack” food supplements to certain White Pine County students for the weekends, giving them a healthy start. From a meager beginning of helping 50 kids to 600 this month, the program grew to a community volunteer effort and is funded by donations.

You Get More Than You Can Imagine

There is nothing quite like helping others who are in difficulties, especially when they have no control over their circumstances. It can make a retirement blossom! Your personal growth awesome! Sometimes you only need to look beyond your own life to see that so much help is needed and what you have to give is really worthwhile to those in need.

CACH is now operated by volunteers and fundraisers in the White Pine community, including support from local businesses like the Robinson Nevada Mining Co. and the White Pine County School District.

The backpacks are packed by high school students and distributed weekly. The backpacks have non-perishable, nutritious food easily prepared by children. School personnel recognize that students do better in school when their bodies are fueled with nutritious food. In some families, weekends can be sparse for nutrition. The backpacks supplement the food prepared in the home.

P.S. Ely, NV has grown its own answers to small communities that fall on difficult economic times, especially communities that lose their business foundations. Check out my post “Personal Growth Through Community Service”. More community development has produced much pride in the community since I wrote that post in 2010. I’ll be telling you all about it in future posts.

Grow Your Zest For Retirement Life

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Do Your Beliefs Limit the Good Retirement Life?

Retirement can be great or “not so much”, depending on how much optimism you feel and what you have to enjoy. Many times what you enjoy is entirely dependent on MINDSET. Throughout our lives, what we believe sets the tone for our quality of life and our personal growth. You can change your mindset and live your life passionately.

Often seniors don’t realize that with practice, you can improve and do more than you dreamed! An optimistic view-point always drives more happiness.

Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D., Stanford Psychologist, reveals her years of research into mindset in her book “Mindset, The New Psychology of Success”.


Do You Keep a Tight Rein on New Adventures?

The “growth mindset” allows you to reach your potential by not being afraid to cultivate the person you want to be, hence the person who can accomplish the things you value and have the experiences you value. The importance of effort plays a big part in the growth mindset.

In contrast, the “fixed mindset” leads you to feel limited to permanent abilities, that you can’t change. Hence needing to prove yourself over and over, but not believing that you could get better in such characteristics as intelligence, artistic talent or sports ability.

Take The Test

Dr. Dweck offers a quick check about your mindset with a set of four questions for you to decide if you mostly agree or disagree with each one:

1. You are a certain kind of person, and there is not much that can be done to really change that.
2. No matter what kind of person you are, you can always change substantially.
3. You can do things differently, but the important parts of who you are can’t really be changed.
4. You can always change basic things about the kind of person you are.

Questions 1 and 3 are the “fixed mindset” questions; questions 2 and 4 reflect the “growth mindset”.

The book is a quick and easy read with helpful personal growth suggestions throughout, and it is not expensive on Amazon. Tips for grandparenting and mentoring others are many; the trick will be to master them yourselves first! Love of learning and resilience form the basis for great accomplishment and just plain fun.

Brain Changes Aid Personal Growth

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Improve Coping Skills at All Ages

Awareness and learning about the brain can be a scary topic. Many people, including seniors, just opt out of neurological information as too complicated to spend much time exploring. Not so! Continue reading

Caregivers Can Use Life Coaching Principles

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Rounding Out The Caregiver Role

When a person is dropped into a caregiver role, it may seem impossible to know how to begin. A light bulb lit up for me this weekend while attending a coaching conference: many of the same guidelines of life coaching can be applied in a slightly different manner to caregiving.

Basically, the physical and medical needs of the “patient” are major, of course. But, some of the most thorny caregiving issues are how to relate emotionally to the elder or disabled, how to help with their emotions, and how to motivate independent living in the face of disappointment and struggles. Whether you’re a caregiver or life coach you’re about to model and teach a whole new way for the person to cope and live with whatever challenges that are now a part of life.

Becoming Skilled at Fostering Positive Attitudes

How can a caregiver resolve problems so that the elder or disabled can have greater personal growth and coping skills? A caregiver has to navigate through a variety of scenarios ranging from the “patient’s” emotional reactions to a disability to problems that involve family interactions. Bottom line: as a caregiver, you must become skilled at working with human beings to produce positive change and help that person adapt to the new challenges that surface. Pretty tall order!

One of the first orders of business is to explore your own attitudes and possible negativity. No, you are not expected to make life perfect and everything back to normal! You are not responsible for what has happened to make the person disabled. However, you do have responsibility for providing positive support. You can’t work miracles, but you can model encouragement, help in coping with “life’s lemons,” and do the best you can to bring a light of sunshine. Empathy is far from sympathy, and it should be a basic tenet of your care giving.

Many physical problems can be modified with home medical equipment. In turn, the confidence built by having the right equipment spills over into the emotional realm.

Disabilities May Be Missed as Our Parents Age

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Aging Disabilities May Start Slowly

Deciding on the need for adaptive equipment may require noticing details and subtle differences as age progresses in our loved ones. We may even tend to overlook a lessening of functioning in our elderly parents, or not realize the time is coming when caregiving, possibly in their home, will be necessary.

Pain may be increased with age and disabilities and require attention and/or medical and psychological interventions. Depression almost always increased pain. See other posts on pain management.

We may even resist moving into our roles as caregivers, wanting our parents to stay the strong and sturdy parents we always knew. Or perhaps the thought of giving that care may be too big of a burden, and we turn to denial, a problem that surely complicates the elder’s and potential caretaker’s lives. Thus both parties may struggle with depression and guilt.

Signs to Look For

If their movements are tentative and unsure, perhaps it would be wise to evaluate where the failings are beginning. It is a given that sitting down and getting up become more of an effort as age progresses. Hesitancy in walking and being a little unsteady on their feet may be some of the first signs.

Usually, the elder will start noticing how easy tasks have become difficult. They may comment, “I’m not as sure of myself as I usually am”, or “I can’t seem to go as far as I used to.” Sometimes even, “I guess I’m getting old” will be expressed with a sense of loss and regret.

Managing the Emotional Side

Depression is common and may need the assistance of professionals, including evaluation by psychiatric professionals regarding medication needs. Honest expression of emotions by both the elder and potential caretaker can stop damaging build up of resentments. Ask a psychologist to help mediate the discussion, if you are uncertain how to handle emotions.

Acceptance is Difficult

Many times, the elder will not accept using a walker or wheelchair, usually feeling that the use of these items will be a public announcement of their “weaknesses.” Some will want to hold on until they can’t hide the lessening of abilities; some even may fall or not be able to walk without hurting themselves. Definitely, help is a necessity now.

Many Products are Available to Meet a Range of Needs

Often the ability to be mobile is a gradual failing, one that family may not notice as it begins. When it becomes more and more apparent that age is progressing, thinking of help with personal care and mobility will be appreciated. The elderly may be embarrassed or not want to admit that simple tasks have become difficult.

However, adapting to challenges will not escape anyone, and making mobility and personal care safer and easier are certainly good places to start. Do research about home medical products and adaptive equipment to solve a variety of problems.